I always touch you as if I miss
Lit too little to excite
I am calling you my dearest
silently in the switched-off lights
But whatever I mean
it’s only me
I am not used to making contact
I’m underpinned and warped
With a body of ashamed neglect
and a soul made of scars
But whatever I mean
it’s only me
Too dark to hear
Too silent to see
Too me to dear
Too you to sweep
All underneath
I don’t even appear as a crescent
Merely a faded dot in the sky
So do not howl at my presence
all you’ll get back is denial
‘Cause whatever I mean
it’s only me
So you crawl alone through the crude nights
Silhouettes of silent grief
How much longer can you abide
with what I am underneath
‘Cause whatever I mean
it’s always me
Too dark to hear
Too silent to see
Too me to dear
Too you to sweep
All underneath
I know it shouldn’t be an excuse
Even scarred tissue hungers to fuse
But as long as I’m able to refuse
I control being rejected by you